ACCEPTANCE

(The A inTEAM)

In theory it sounds right and easy to accept every member of your team for who and what they are.

To accommodate their uniqueness and differentness into the group. To be enriched with the abilities and perspective that they are able to bring to the table.

In practice real acceptance it is not so easy. It requires a lot of maturity on different levels to really and truly accept a person in context of his/ her back ground, personality, baggage and mannerisms.

As human beings and more so as leaders, we have a tendency to reinforce who and what we are in others. We might even misjudge a particular fresh or new viewpoint as dissidence and alien to the team, just because it is different to ours.

The stronger and more real the acceptance of each member in a team by the rest of the team is, the more dynamic and versatile that team potentially becomes.  Acceptance empowers creativity and creates energy within teams.

Real acceptance involves the willingness:

-To (try to) understand and give recognition to a person in context 
  of where he/ she come from in terms of background, culture and  tradition.
-To welcome who a person is in character and personality type. (With all the 
  intricacies that goes with it).  
-To favourably receive his/ her different, or even “strange” way of 
  looking at things, as well as the peculiar mannerisms and ways of
  expression that he/she might have.

True acceptance is more than just being mindful of a person. It is the act of welcoming, receiving and endorsing someone, to the extent of really believing in him/her.

Acceptance is never just tolerating a person, but all of the above -as well as celebrating his/ her uniqueness and role in the team!

-How accepting are you of the members of your team?

ChAnGe.

What is your approach to change?

-Do you resist it at all cost and fervently defend the status quo?

Are you a reluctant changer? Will you accept change when you see that it is working and that most people are supporting it?  Do you adapt easily to change, or are you one of the about 2% innovators who create change in your community?

 

Interestingly research has found that the leaders of successful organizations are normally about equally, either innovators or resistors to change....

Most people change when they have to: Either because they suffered enough pain, or because they have gained enough information and understanding to see the benefits of a new approach.  

Even then some of us approach change in an evolutionary way, slowly transforming and creating something new from the old. Others choose to approach change in a revolutionary way: Putting something completely new and different in place quickly.

I don’t think any of the two is by definition right or wrong.  –Quite a few variables need to be taken into consideration to determine whether a fast-slow, or a slow-fast approach will be best in a particular situation.  -Do you want to take most people with you?  Do the people you are leading have enough trust in you to just follow you into something new? Can you afford to lose half of the group, clients, or followers?    –Of importance is that you spend some thought on it and know why you choose a specific approach.

We are living in an ever changing world. It is not something new.  Ever since the first seasons emerged the world experiences a process of continuous change.  The industrial and information revolutions brought great changes to how we live and work.  Some people tried to resist it, but still slowly and surely change did come ......

What makes our experience different, is the fact that we’re living in times of increasingly fast paced, discontinuous and even disruptive change!  The world and culture/s that we are living in are literally changing before our eyes!

The rapid changes in thought, culture, information technology, globalization, religious- and race plurality, to name a few, have a definite impact on the nature of leadership.  

If and when you do lead change in your company, community of family - remember this:

1.The greatest challenge is to first change yourself.

2.Take the trouble to get to know the history and background of the organization in which you want to create change. –That creates understanding, trust and context.

3. Create opportunities for people to discuss the proposed changes and to give their input, that helps them to take ownership of the process.

4. Create urgency.

5. Create a synergetic leading group of “change agents” to model and live the change.

6. Always lead change from the basis and in the context of mutual trust.

7. Communicate the why and the how of change continuously and thoroughly.

Change will always be part of life:

If you think you are (tired of and) finished with change:

You are finish!

The E in TEAM.

 
In some teams only the leader/s are important. What they do gets mentioned and acknowledged. The successes and victories are normally theirs. The failures and mishaps are always somebody else’s.
 
For a team to function as a team e v e r y b o d y on that team should be seen as equally important and needs to know it.  For the team to be successful and obtain wins, every team member needs to function according to his/ her strengths and be given responsibility and authority to fulfil their task.
 
I just recently visited a medium sized organization where I experienced the incapacitating and demoralizing effect on individuals and a team as a whole, of having responsibility, but not the authority to make any decisions!
 
The most important aspect of an effective and winning team is not the hierarchy or pecking order, (that is so last century!) but a clear knowledge and articulation of the function and role of each team member.
 
Empowerment of every team member to fulfil their particular function is equally important.

Empowerment includes, but is much more than just the transference and accumulation of knowledge and best practice.

I believe that God has a picture, or dream for each one of us to fully and uniquely become who He imagined us to be, when He created us.

Empowerment should be that of the whole person and should enable us to transform and move towards the realization of that unique picture and plan that God has for each one of us.

When everybody on a team are empowered according to their strengths to fulfil their function and purpose and if they cooperate on the basis of trust, (see last week's post) a real team will be established and flourish!

For me the E in team stands for EMPOWERING EVERYBODY!

The T in team.

 

I know this has been done before. -Many have used the word TEAM as an acronym and assign a concept or principal to each letter. Here is my version at this point in time:

Over years I've seen that one of the most important, if not the most crucial ingredient in the mix of team dynamics, is trust. For me the T in team thus needs to be a upper case big fat letter T, standing for TRUST.

Without a reasonably high level of trust friendships suffer, marriages falter and teams are bogged down in the trenches of hidden agendas and suspicion.

Where does trust come from? Is it just something you do when someone say:

"Trust me." ?  Is it something that is expected from you, or that you expect from others? Can you train team members to trust one another?

Some people are more trusting than others. They seem to trust others easily and sometimes without any apparent reason. This type of trust many a time is thwarted and I've heard how people painfully resolved "never to trust anybody again."

In essence trust cannot be learned or expected.
Trust is earned.
You can built trust.
You can only trust what or who you know.
Trust can be destroyed and in some cases it is very difficult and even impossible to restore.

How do you built and earn trust in a team?

-Built authentic and caring relationships.
-Be there for one another.
-Be consistent and truthful.
-Show that you as team member or -leader is not only looking out for yourself,
  but for the growth, benefit and happiness of each team member.
-Value the contribution and view point of each team member.
-Spend time together: Talking, eating, planning and having fun.

The most important factor in all of the above, is time. Trust cannot be microwaved.
At the end of each of the above sentences, add the words "over time."

It takes time to built trust, but it can be destroyed in an instant.
-Guard it! 
This is the responsibility of each team member, but especially that of the leader.

 

Common sense and leadership.

"Common sense is not so common after all."
These word have been attributed to the philosopher Voltaire.

Another philosopher and writer, Rene Descartes said: "Common sense is the most widely shared commodity in the world, for every man is convinced that he is well supplied with it."

A few years ago somebody published an obituary lamenting the death of Common Sense, in the London Times. I could not establish above doubt who the original author was. There are quite a few adaptations of this going around and I have copied one of them at the bottom of this post.

What is common sense? -The dictionaries describe it as practical wisdom. -To do what should obviously be done, on the basis of a simple, sound and prudent understanding and judgement of facts and circumstances, based on simple straight forward perception....

We are indeed living in times where many people seem to have lost the ability to apply common sense to their daily lives. It seems that a lot of people do not know (anymore) that boiled water is scalding hot and that a wet tiled floor is most probably slippery!

Even in politics we badly need common sense.  I thought of stating a "Common Sense Party" -Might get a vote or two from people with common sense....

Common sense plays a mayor role in leadership -or it should!

Leadership starts naturally form a point, or in a situation where somebody realises that something needs to be done and that someone needs to start doing it. The person who takes the initiative then (at least for some time) becomes the leader in that context.

Geese fly in formation to save energy and probably for direction. One of them needs to fly in front. Hunting dogs run in packs, but one of them takes the lead. -It is just common sense to them. As far as we know they don't even "think" about it -they just do it.

Most leadership decisions and actions are not rocket science, but (should be) based on a healthy dose of common sense. 

Can common sense be improved?

I think so.  -I think you can improve your common sense by reading wide. By listening to a lot of different people. -Especially well seasoned leaders and also to "unschooled" leaders.
You can improve your common sense by making and taking more time to think and to reflect on your life experiences and challenges.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The death of common sense.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

Knowing when to come in out of the rain; accidents may happen; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn’t always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults are in charge, not children).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 8-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home but the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little on her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, his wife, Discretion, his daughters, Responsibility and Integrity and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights; I Want It Now; Someone Else Is To Blame and I’m A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone...

 -What appears to be the original article can be viewed at www.loriborgman.com

Becoming what you do.

Try this: Ask people to describe themselves and to tell you more about who they are.
Most of the time, within the first few sentences they will tell you what they do for a living.


I once visited someone I knew, who had just retired and moved to a city in another part of the country. He used to lead a medium sized organization and served on the board of a bigger one.  I went for coffee and asked him: "How are you doing?"


His answer was blunt and bitter: "Not good."  When I asked why, he said: "I am nothing,
a nobody.  -The one day people asked for my opinion and guidance, the next nobody phoned me or even notices me."


This may say something about how we treat our old people and retired leaders, (if you can ever retire from being a leader) but it says a lot more about our identity as leaders.


Who are you?


It seems to me that we easily become what we do. Without trying, over time, we come to a place where we define ourselves by our job description and/ or position.  When for some reason that position or job description changes, we seem to lose our identity.


How can we ever let ourselves become so empoveraged?


You are and should stay much more that what you do professionally!!


You are a person with value, thoughts, feelings and (hopefully) interests apart from what you do during office hours.


Take a moment now and ask yourself: "Who am I"


Describe yourself, your interests, passions, personality and your being.
-Without mentioning your job or professional responsibilities and position.


How did it go?

2 Influence

I has been said that "leadership is influence: Nothing more and nothing less." *

Influence does not depend on position, but on the ability of a person to have an effect on others that causes them to agree, to follow and to work with him/ her because they want to.

When they have to because you have positional power to move them and remove them, then you do not necessarily have leadership. You might be in a position of leadership over them, but all you actually have is a position and that is the lowest level of leadership!

Leadership is about the influence you have on people, without the positional use of authority and/or money.The greater this influence, the stronger your leadership.

The question that leaders should ask themselves then is: "How do I build my influence?" -And again you might be tempted to go the route of position and power, believing that it is influence, while it is in fact only leverage and coercion. -That is all that some leaders want though......

Building influence and thus building real leadership, is about creating meaning for yourself and for others. It is about being busy with the things that brings purpose to life: It's about focusing on the passion/s that God has created in you. Working on and in the areas of your passion, creates energy and focus -and people just can't resist that! Meaning, passion, energy and focus in the live of a leader builds influence.

John Maxwell said that "the extent of your influence depends on the depth of your concern for others." That's probably the biggest building block of influence: The fact that you really care for other people and you don't just act as if you do because it is part of your job description. It is about having enough confidence in who you are, that you are able to serve others.

This is about building a way of life where you are not position minded, but focused on the impact your function has, or could have on the lives and needs of those around you, by putting them before your own agenda.  In this context it is important to note that serving others, is not always the same as pleasing them.

- Are you building your influence or just advancing your position?
- Do you know the difference??


* J. Oswald Sanders in George Barna 1997 Leaders on leadership, seems to be the first to use this phrase.John Maxwell 1993 Developing the leader within you, have enhanced and popularized it.